By Justin Isherwood

I have resisted the call, I mean the one for a wall, as a child of stony fields and Robert Frost might.  To add President Reagan’s sage advice “tear down this wall”  “Something there is … that doesn’t love a wall.”

As that child of the late ’50s, as a proper American kid, I was insulted by the Commie penchant for walls,  the Iron Curtain, the Bamboo Curtain.  Never mind this was at some variance to my farmkid perspective, where fencing was a natural preoccupation.  The child I was, devoted a fair portion of life and energy to building fence, walls.  Repairing, stretching, re-stretching, digging post holes, to the point I yet do this in an unconscious state.  This effort designed to restrain immigrant … cows.  All this can now be done with a few strands of electric tape and fragile posts driven in the ground with a ballpeen hammer.  Quite unfair compared to the obligation of semi-slavery a good fence once imposed on its practitioners.  Perhaps cows were wilder then.

We are aware of the multitude of tourists who annually visit the world’s great walls.  The Great Wall of China, built over a span of 200 years, some seven generations’ worth, spanning 5,500 miles.  The Ming Wall courses uphill and down, with gradient at times exceeding that of a toboggan run.  Here is walling on a grand scale, to which none complain, if perhaps the ghosts of the 1.2 million who built it. Still it was a job, seven generation’s worth of employment.

Hadrian’s wall, at a modest 89 miles enjoys a similar tourist allure, a touch crude perhaps, but these were enlisted men a long way from home.  Hadrian’s Wall is the economy driver with a per annum return to enliven dozens of towns, pubs and B&Bs with a regular source of income.  All in all a remarkable investment return.

The Western Wall, i.e. Wailing Wall runs a mere 1,601 feet in Old Jerusalem, its limestone edifice poignantly detailed with prayers posted by believers and non-believers alike.  The wall of 40,000 tons, 20,000 semis worth of carts, slavishness and not a real plow horse in sight.  A wall divided for male and female observance that enjoys none of the notoriety of the Pyramids being slave-built, at least no one asks, and sees tens of thousands of visitors per annum providing low-input income for hotels, restaurants, souvenir stands.  Our President Trump would say “millions, millions.”

I here confess I want the President to build his wall, and take all the time and money he needs because I now see the rationale.  Mr. President, you want a wall, let’s do a really really great wall, coast to coast, all unsecured 1,954 miles.  Let’s make this wall a Wonder of the World, even if it takes 5 generations, a high grade, tourist wall.  Our President surely knows this, Speaker Nancy doesn’t.  The Wall will take tens of thousands of workers, if the Great Wall is an indicator, five generations.  Right there on the border, tens of thousands of jobs, yet to include support services.  Employment will skyrocket, union wages, health care, there is something here for everyone.  I’m sorry, Mr. President, we Liberals had this all wrong.  You were right, a wall does solve the immigration problem.

To the honor of the President, I propose we so name this 2,000 mile edifice, to be known to history ever after as the Trump Wall.  Conveniently enough a site for the Presidential Library.  And if I may be so bold, a resting place, all of it properly Trumpian, that’s a word now, Trumpian, with towers attached.

Just like the Ming Wall, lots of towers, promenades, patios, tea gardens, hostels, Motel 6, McDonalds, Kentucky Fried, Taco Bell.  Given our president’s preference, golf courses.  Corporations can vie for local and regional naming rights in anticipation of the Wall’s tourist draw.   This wall thing will take awhile, done right the jobs could last generations, steady employment, the naming rights alone worth millions, a lasting legacy to Trump.  Only to add solar panels and wind turbines, a nuke plant or two and this Trump edifice could radically affect the carbon cycle.  It’s truly brilliant.

Mr. President, I apologize for our slowness to understand the possibilities of your Wall.  Meaning big, big.  Really really big.  And you were right, Mexico will pay if they want their share of the franchises.  To bet Canada will soon want a wall, even bigger.  And come to think, maybe Wisconsin needs a wall, just north of Big Foot, with a  bike path, hotels, casinos, golf courses, souvenirs.  Brilliant Mr. President, truly brilliant.